Achieving Happiness Column for 1-30-05 By Tom Muha, Ph.D. SPIRITUAL INTELLIGENCE   We all have a deep inner desire to live a great life in which we contribute to making the world a better place. That is, after all, what brings the highest level of happiness. You may doubt that you have the ability to make a great contribution, but I believe that you have the potential to do so. I have this conviction because I’ve seen thousands of people consciously choose to forsake their mediocre life in favor of living a life of greatness. I’ve seen the magnificent spirit of human beings awakened, frequently when confronting a crisis. Some chose to inspire others in the face of an incurable illness. Others chose to give a struggling child a sense of worth and potential. Still others chose to become a leader in improving the organization in which they work or the community in which they live. MAKING GREAT CHOICES Your birthright as a human being is to have the power of choice. Harnessing that power gives you the ability to choose to move beyond having a good life by deciding each day what you can do to have a great life. Your ability to make great choices is rooted in your spiritual intelligence (SQ), the most fundamental of the four dimensions of your intellectual capabilities. Your SQ guides your choices, thereby helping you make the best use of your physical, mental and emotional intelligence. Your spirit is the quiet voice within you that always points you in the direction of what is right, not just for yourself, but for the fulfillment and security of others as well. LOW SPIRITUAL IQ         An individual with underdeveloped SQ selfishly focuses of his own survival and pleasure. He sees others as a threat in the competition to get the most. Therefore, he tries to control and disempower them. The person lacking in SQ hates negative feedback because it challenges the validity of his own agenda. Instead, he expounds upon the justifications for his choices even when his actions have hurt others. Because his thinking is based on a rigid belief that he’s right no matter what others may say, his judgement is impaired. His moral compass develops significant deviation. HIGH SPIRITUAL IQ People with highly-developed SQ understand that there are bigger, more important matters than what’s happening in their small corner of the world. They are able to see how they can to contribute to the greater good, even when that means subordinating their own needs.   They have a peaceful, confident presence that comes from knowing what it is that they value most, and then acting accordingly - regardless of the actions of others. They do the right thing because they’ve come to understand that if everyone did so, the world would be a better place. They see the fulfillment of their needs as being interdependent on others having their needs satisfied as well. Thus, they value feedback as an essential mechanism for accurately assessing the well being of their family, friends, coworkers, and community. DEVELOPING SPIRITUAL IQ The enduring religions and philosophies around the world agree that there is a set of values involving trustworthiness, respect, fairness, and helping others that transcend time and culture. In order to live these values you must develop your integrity by making and keeping promises to yourself, to others, and to humanitarian causes. For example, building integrity for yourself might start with a small promise to exercise 10 minutes every day, and then doing it. With others, it might mean vowing to express your appreciation at least once a day, and then keeping your word. For a cause, integrity could involve volunteering time to an organization that’s helping with disaster relief efforts, and making it a long-term commitment. Mother Teresa captured the essence of spirituality when she wrote: People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered; forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true friends; succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway. If you find security and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway. Give the world your best anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.   Tom Muha is a psychologist in Annapolis. He welcomes your comments and questions. To contact him call (443) 454-7274 or email him at tom@achievinghappiness.com.